1. Can no longer afford the luxury of providing free lollipops to customers.
2. Your wife has started making snide remarks behind your back and calls you a “Moneylender.”
3. Pedophile priests have higher approval ratings.
4. Mistakenly thought the federal stimulus package was a personal bonus.
5. You don’t even trust yourself anymore.
6. Hoarding is your new business strategy.
7. Financial crisis? Looks like we need a weeklong brainstorming session in Maui.
8. You rolled out the predictable scapegoat for the financial collapse: poor people.
9. “Loan” is the new four-letter word.
10. Ceased and desisted on allowances to your children.
11. Wish you voted for the Republicans (oh, wait, you did).
12. Your new motto: Fuck Main Street.
12 Signs That You Might Be A Literary Agent
12 Signs That You Might Have Been Laid-Off
12 Signs That You Might Be Edgar Allan Poe
Can we roll out the tumbrils, yet? I want tumbrils. I hear they're going to be all the rage if this depression gets any worse. Which it will.
ReplyDeleteWell, you may have your wish soon. The markets went into a tailspin today. The Dow lost more than 4 percent and sank to 6,763 - which is a staggeringly low closing since the high of 14,000.
ReplyDeletenice info
ReplyDeletei like point nomber 12
ReplyDeleteNot Frank in the River, but Frank's Faux Pa. The one with the frayed rug. Afraid rug? I don't know.
ReplyDelete