::Literate Blather::
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Poem: Quiet Contemplations in my Hometown Church on Christmas Eve
By Jess Myers

And so it was that there appeared across the aisle
a multitude of people I didn’t like in high school.
And there were in the same pew
the husbands of those people,
and yay! They seemed utterly bored with marriage,
which means, I suspect,
that they’ve stopped screwing
(other people)

And fear not!
For there are good tidings of great joy!
for her ass has doubled
(and her chin,
increasing surface area for her beard)

And yea, though her husband has clearly given up
and looks to be a Yeti lumberjack,
I have caught him staring at me,
for since graduation
my wardrobe has improved,
my ass has not increased,
and my breasts have.

And there were in the same place
my uncle’s children and his ex-wife,
and the glory of the Lord shone around her
for she was lit like a Christmas tree.

And the babe refused to be swaddled,
but stood on her thighs and screamed
“I hate you Mom, I want to live with my Dad!”
And verily I smiled and waved
and she rolled her eyes and said
“we’re just living the dream.”

And I kept all these things
and pondered them in my heart.
Along with my plans to leave and never return.

And lo, that eve, I slept in heavenly peace.

Read Jess's poem "The Strangest Thing"

(Jess Myers is a graduate of Ithaca College who works for a finance company in New York City. Her work is largely autobiographical, though she sometimes calls it fiction, because she takes perverse pleasure in seeing what meaning people ascribe to her life. Her favorite writers are David Sedaris (whose reading inspired her to change her major from vocal performance to creative writing), Dorothy Parker, and Flannery O'Connor, to name a few. Jess is also a trained equestrian and archer. Her full portfolio can be found on WritersCafe.org.)

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