DaRK PaRTY ReVIEW

::Literate Blather::

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

12 Signs That You Might Be A Banker

1. Can no longer afford the luxury of providing free lollipops to customers.

2. Your wife has started making snide remarks behind your back and calls you a “Moneylender.”

3. Pedophile priests have higher approval ratings.

4. Mistakenly thought the federal stimulus package was a personal bonus.

5. You don’t even trust yourself anymore.

6. Hoarding is your new business strategy.

7. Financial crisis? Looks like we need a weeklong brainstorming session in Maui.

8. You rolled out the predictable scapegoat for the financial collapse: poor people.

9. “Loan” is the new four-letter word.

10. Ceased and desisted on allowances to your children.

11. Wish you voted for the Republicans (oh, wait, you did).

12. Your new motto: Fuck Main Street.

12 Signs That You Might Be A Literary Agent

12 Signs That You Might Have Been Laid-Off

12 Signs That You Might Be Edgar Allan Poe

Labels: 12 Signs, Banker, Humor, Politics

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Posted by GFS3 at 12:24 PM.

5 comments

5 Comments:

Madam Miaow said...

Can we roll out the tumbrils, yet? I want tumbrils. I hear they're going to be all the rage if this depression gets any worse. Which it will.

March 02, 2009 3:05 PM

GFS3 said...

Well, you may have your wish soon. The markets went into a tailspin today. The Dow lost more than 4 percent and sank to 6,763 - which is a staggeringly low closing since the high of 14,000.

March 02, 2009 5:34 PM