DaRK PaRTY ReVIEW
::Literate Blather::
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Thor: Sex Advice Columnist

The God of Thunder Answers Readers Sensitive Inquiries on Sex




Dear Thor:
This is kind of embarrassing, but I’ve been having major problems keeping an erection during sex with my wife. I love her a lot, but she’s put on extra weight lately and all that flab just doesn’t do it for me. I’ve tried everything including snapping off the lights and closing my eyes to pretend that she’s Angelina Jolie. Nothing works. I’m desperate! Can you help me?
Signed,
Desperate in Detroit

DEAR DESPARATE:
I AM THOR GOD OF THUNDER! SLAYER OF GIANTS! EATER OF THE DEAD! STORM BRINGER! YOU, ON THE OTHER HAND, ARE THE GOD OF SOFT! NO MAN CAN GET ERECT THINKING ABOUT ANGELINA JOLIE! NOT EVEN BRAD PITT! FAT MAIDENS HAVE MORE CUSHION FOR THE PUSHIN’! COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS AND TAKE YOUR MAIDEN FROM BEHIND WHILE SCREAMING WAR HOWLS!
SINCERELY,
THOR

Dear Thor:
I’m 14 years old and I’m really nervous about the possibility of being gay. I keep dreaming about my Social Studies teacher Mr. Cagney. He’s this bald, fat guy, but he really seems to “get” me. The dreams are always about the two of us French kissing in the coat closet. Is this normal? Help me please!
Signed
Confused Boy

DEAR CONFUSED BOY:
I AM THOR GOD OF THUNDER! I AM THE SYMBOL OF ALL THAT IS MASCULINE AND POWERFUL! BUT ONCE I DID DREAM OF CARCASSING THE FIRM ASS OF LOKI AND WOKE WITH A START! IN MY RAGE AND CONFUSION, I DECIDED TO FIRE BOMB DENMARK WITH LIGHTNING BOLTS AND KILLED MANY VILLAGERS! THEN I POUNDED LOKI INTO A BLOODY PULP! TAKE A BATTLE AX TO MR. CAGNEY AND YOU WILL FEEL MUCH BETTER!
SINCERELY,
THOR

Hi Thor:
I’m a 38-year-old woman and lately I can’t stop thinking about sex. Sex, sex, sex – it’s on my mind constantly. Every man I meet I want to touch and grope, and, well, you get the picture! I’ve heard that women enter their sexual prime in middle age. Should I act out on these urges or just try to control them?
Signed
Horny Executive

DEAR HORNY:
SEND THOR PHOTOGRAPH AND ADDRESS! YOU HAVEN’T HAD SEX UNTIL YOU’VE HAD THOR THE GOD OF THUNDER! THOR WILL LET TOUCH, GROPE AND KISS HIS HUGE WAR HAMMER!
SINCERELY,
THOR

Dear Thor:
My boyfriend wants me to agree to have a threesome with his best friend. His friend is kind of cute, but I’m worried that this will ruin my relationship with my boyfriend. It seems kind of reckless and irresponsible. I know you’re a Norse God and all, but I was raised a Christian and this type of behavior is considered a sin. What should I do?
Signed
Good Girl

DEAR GOOD GIRL:
THOU SHOULD NOT LISTEN TO BAD ADVICE FROM JESUS CHRIST! VIKING WOMEN OFTEN DO RAPING AND PILLAGING AND YOU SHOULD DO THE SAME! DRINK MUCH GROG AND THEN MOUNT THOSE TWO BOYS LIKE THEY WERE WILD WOLVES OF THE NORTH!
SINCERELY,
THOR

Dear Thor:
I’m just going to come out and say this: I think I have a problem with masturbation. I can’t seem to go more than a few hours without pumping the dragon. I waxed the rascal at work. I polish the hard hat at home. I pull the snake in the shower. I rip the chord in the car. I can’t stop! How often does a “normal” guy masturbate anyway?
Signed
Nervous

DEAR NERVOUS:
WHEN THOR GETS URGE TO PLEASURE SELF HE ORDER VALKALERIES TO DO IT FOR HIM. THIS IS BECAUSE I AM GOD OF THUNDER, STORM BRINGER, AND SON OF ODIN! YOU, HOWEVER, ARE BEAT OFF AND LOSER! THOR WILL CRUSH YOU LIKE A BUG AND PUT YOU OUT OF YOUR MISERY!
SINCERELY,
THOR


(Thor’s advice is his own and doesn’t necessary reflect the editorial views of DaRK PaRTY. To ask Thor a question or send him a comment please wait until the winter solstice and then sacrifice a ram, two chickens, and a horse on stone table carved with Altuna runes. Then chant your request with your arms raised while facing north. Thor promises he will try to answer each inquiry, but please be patient.)

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Monday, April 28, 2008
5 Questions About: Erotica

An Interview with Erotic Writer Polly Frost


(DaRK PaRTY can be a bit of a prude. As a result, we don’t read much erotica – a fancy word for “dirty sex books.” Remember when “erotica” used to be sneaking a look at the topless natives in National Geographic? Well, it’s evolved. But curious as we are DP wanted to learn more about erotic. Help us, you know, stop being so damn repressed. So we turned to Polly Frost, a writer who recently published a collection of erotic tales called “Deep Inside.” Polly and her husband, Ray Sawhill, co-wrote and produced the comic and, well, raunchy Web series “The Fold” (due for release this summer). Also with her hubby, Polly co-wrote the X-rated and funny radio play “Sex Scenes.” Polly and Ray are working on two horror movie projects. Recently, Polly was kind enough to give DP a tutorial on all things erotic.)

DaRK PaRTY: How do you personally distinguish between erotica and pornography?

Polly: The usual joke is that erotica is what arouses me and porn is what arouses you. I like the way it points out what porn and erotica s
hare in common, which is an intention to arouse the audience. Me, I really like art that's arousing, and I respect and enjoy the intention to arouse. Arousing-ness is a big part of why I love the arts generally. Speaking purely personally, though, I tend to take "porn" to mean arousing art that's blunt where "erotica" tends to imply arousing art that's fancier and more veiled.

As for my own work: While I love to turn my readers on, I really think of myself as a satirist who writes subversive, x-rated comedy. And I
don't see how you can write satire without writing about sex! I mean, how can you live in this country and not write about the conflicted, crazy attitudes Americans have about sex?

When I first started out as a writer, I wrote humor pieces, for The New Yorker and for other publications. I loved writing humor, but I also found writing humor pieces for mainstream publications very limiting because I couldn't write explicitly about sex.

When it comes to the term "porn," I'm not offended if that's what some people call what I write. I don't think it's the case, but that's just me being picky. Besides, I'm a fan of a lot of porn filmmakers and stars. When Tor, the publisher of "Deep Inside," asked for me to get blurbs for my book, the first person I sent my book to was Ron Jeremy, who's famous as the porn star "The Hedgehog."

I think Ron is incredibly smart and witty, and an important pop-culture figure. People in their twenties all know Ron Jeremy. He's like a ro
ck star or a comedian to them. So I was thrilled when Ron loved "Deep Inside" and praised it in porn terms. He said it gave him a boner. That's high praise, and from an expert source!

There's always been a connection between porn and cutting edge entertainment and art -- whether it's the stand-up comedy of Lenny Bruce, or
the art of Jeff Koons, or the current thriving burlesque scene as practiced by artists like Dita Von Teese, Nasty Canasta, and Julie Atlas Muz, or the sex satire in "South Park."

DP: What writers do you think write excellent erotic fiction?

Polly: I think the best erotic fiction is written from within the characters, and therefore isn't moral (or romantic or uplifting) about the characters. The scheming couple that Choderlos de Laclos wrote about in "Dangerous Liaisons" is a delicious and riveting creation. That story has remained popular because Laclos doesn't shy away from the differences between men and women when it comes to sex, love, and affairs. It's cold, it's objective, and it's true.

Some others ... Junichiro Tanizaki wrote some of the best erotic fiction. I love his sly masterpiece about masochism, "Naomi." My husband and I -- we often co-write together -- are both huge fans of Terry Southern, who wrote the exuberant sexual satires "Blue Movie" and "Candy," as well as ribald scripts for some of Hollywood's best movies of the '60's.

"The Story of O" by Pauline Reage is essential erotic fiction reading because it captures a female archetype: the modern independent woman who longs to be dominated. Reage doesn't excuse her character's drive, or romanticize it, or turn it into something "sex positive." It's just there, and she puts it on paper once and for all. I also think that "The Story of O" is a deeply religious book about a woman who's on a spiritual quest. I'm a fan of Erica Jong's "Fear of Flying." If you think of it as a dated piece of '70's feminist ranting, read it again! It holds up beautifully and it's hilarious.

I also think some of the best erotic fiction writing was done by bestselling authors of the '60's and '70's: Jacqueline Susann, Harold Robbins, people like that. They wrote about sexually ruthless characters in frank and powerful ways.

There's a big reason they were popular: Their characters resonate. I love it that Robbins and Susann don't soften their characters or try to make them likable. The preoccupation with "likableness" in today's popular-culture world drives me crazy. And it's not very sexy. Since when do you have to like someone to be turned on by them?

Among the contemporary erotic fiction writers: Maxim Jakubowski writes amazingly hot and smart novels himself, and he edits the indispensable "Mammoth" series of erotica anthologies too.

I'm also looking forward to reading "Diana: A Diary in the Second Person" by the Canadian writer, Russell Smith. I love "Lie With Me" by another Canadian writer, Tamara Faith Berger. I think Zane is a wonderfully hot writer, and enjoyed Anne Rice's "Beauty."

In New York City, we're really fortunate to have Rachel Kramer Bussel. She writes her own wonderful stories, edits tons of anthologies, and hosts a terrific erotica reading series called “In the Flesh at Happy Ending Lounge.” Rachel is New York's go-to girl for erotic writing.

DP: How do you judge what makes a good erotic story when writing your own fiction?

Polly: I'm hopin
g that what turns me on will also turn on some of my readers. It's a gamble but what else are you going to do? Besides, part of what I love about erotic fiction is the subjectivity factor. People generally can't fool themselves about what turns them on, while in higher-minded art they can lose themselves in fantasies about worthwhileness or "art." They can talk themselves into thinking they love something that they don't really love.

Meanwhile, in erotica, a book or painting or film either works for you personally or it doesn't. While I know that some people see the subjectivity factor as a reason to look down on erotic fiction, I take it to mean that erotic fiction is like suspense fiction: it's the ultimate artistic high-wire act.

I do a few things to keep myself tuned in to other people's minds and desires, though. I like to have actors read whatever I write, for instance. I'm lucky to know some of the best actors in New York City. Having actors read my fiction in front of live audiences has been a tremendous keeping-it-honest experience. I did live readings with actors for five years. I did a monthly series at Cornelia Street Cafe in New York City, and I also toured cities across the country.

I worked with lots of actors, in lots of different venues, in front of all kinds of audiences. I think that was one of the most important things I ever did for my writing because it gave me the chance to experience audience reactions. Honestly, I think all fiction writers should spend five years giving readings. It's hard to put into words what you get out of seeing your work performed live, but it certainly sharpens your audience sense. Too many writers live purely in their heads, it seems to me.

And the actors themselves are fantastic resources. Any really good actor knows if a character is working or not. They know if the moment is true or not.

My favorite response as a writer is laughter accompanied by arousal, which I'm happy to say we got a lot of at our readings! But we've also had couples make out during readings, and we've had people talk back to the stage. There was this one moment we really cherished when one of our actresses was reading a passage in praise of anal sex, and a guy in the audience kind of groaned and moaned and said, "Oh, it's a beautiful thing, baby!" Our actress was very quick and said right back to him, "You know it is." It was a great moment. That was a real highlight of our writing lives!

DP: What are the biggest public misconceptions about erotica?

Polly: The biggest misconception is that erotic fiction is somehow a different creature than fiction-fiction, and that it should be shelved away from the rest of "literature." In book publishing, if you write something with a lot of sex in it, there are two main ways they'll market your book today: either as "sex positive" fiction or as "spicy romance." "Literature" itself has become something that's written -- as my poet friend, Michele Madigan Somerville says -- "from the neck up."

It's really annoying that mainstream publishing views erotic fiction in this way.

The "sex positive" thing is a small peeve of mine. "Sex positive" books are meant to make readers feel good about their sexual desires, whether it's S and M, or for a polyamory lifestyle, or for being whipped. I don
't want to sound unfeeling, and it's not as though I don't care if my readers feel good about themselves sexually.

Of course I do. But honestly, that's something for them to take up with a therapist. I'm a fiction writer and my task is to write about the world as I actually see it. And the world -- and sex, and sexual experiences -- often have dark and even negative sides to them. Sometimes those dark and negative sides are even a big part of what's sexy.

The "sex positive" movement has also had the effect of genderizing erotic writing, which is too bad. Erotica books have become largely written by women for women. Guys -- who used to be enthusiastic readers of dirty books -- are barely catered to at all these days. When was the last time you heard a man say he needed to feel positive about his sex drive?

And I like writing for men as well as women. In fact, the audience for my writing has turned out to be largely male. Guys are the biggest fans of what I write. I'm thrilled!

But it's sad that book publishing and bookstores do suc
h a lousy job of appealing to men. Hey, book-publishing people: Men love reading fiction with sex in it. But they do not want to venture into the romance section to find a book!

One of the reasons that "erotic" books are sequestered is that bookstores are terrified of complaints from the damn soccer moms and librarians. God forbid that teenagers should pick up a book with a sex passage in it, become engrossed in reading, and develop a taste for books. I don't know that I'd be much of a reader myself -- let alone a writer -- had I not started off my reading life looking for dirty books, and for the dirty passages inside mainstream books.

I'll give a personal example. Have you ever heard of the spy novel "Lotta Drum and the 69 Pleasures?" I didn't think so, but I found it instead of a Gideon bible in a hotel room once when I was twelve and couldn't stop reading it. I'd never read anything like the lesbian bamboo torture scenes in it. They also got me reading anything else that had the aura of sex around it, and that includes some great literature, like Henry Miller and Philip Roth. So many thanks to the author of "Lotta Drum" -- whoever you were under that obvious pseudonym -- for turning me into a reader!

DP: You recently published "Deep Inside" that you define as supernatural erotica. Can you describe that concept and what you were trying to accomplish with the book?

Polly: I wanted to write stories that were like the '60's and '70's horror movies that I love: movies like "Barbarella" and the Italian "giallo" films, or like such Japanese movies as "Onibaba" and "Woman in the Dunes." I wanted to write dark and disturbingly arousing stories with dangerous women at the center of them. Another was to develop genuine story lines. In other words, I wanted to create living-breathing characters and put them in highly-charged situations, and I wanted the sex to both create and grow out of those situations.

I wanted each 20 page story to feel like a complete little movie, in other words. I also hoped they'd make people laugh.

As it turns out I've been really pleased by the way people have responded to "Deep Inside." I've heard over and over from readers who have said the stories in "Deep Inside" affected their fantasies, or that they found themselves having dreams about the stories weeks after finishing the book.

I'm also pleased when people write me and say they didn't think they'd ever be interested in erotic fiction until they read it, but that the situations and characters resonate with them.

I never mind if a reader writes me an angry email or pans "Deep Inside." I've had readers say they were disturbed and upset by the book. That's okay with me. I like strong reactions.


Read more of our 5 Questions About:

Ants

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Elvis

Charles Dickens

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Friday, April 25, 2008
Essay: Addicted to Convenience
My neighbor rarely ventures outside of her house. There really is no reason to. Her groceries – peanut butter, toilet paper, Oreos, et al – are delivered each week. Her dry cleaner provides door-to-door service. Landscapers roll up in pick-up trucks like clockwork every time her lawn needs to be mowed or raked. DVDs come in the mail – along with her books.

Pizza and Chinese food deliveries occur a few times a week. And, of course, she has Internet access and cable TV.

Her house is beginning to look a lot like a cocoon.

It’s time to admit that as Americans we’re addicted to shortcuts. We want things to be fast, easy, and cheap. And that spells: convenience. Americans aren’t lazy. Our work productivity is the highest in the world. We work longer hours and take less vacation than other developed nations. But we’re obsessed with saving time (what we’re saving it for is unclear).

Take these rather alarming statistics pointing to our addiction to convenience:

  • The staggering increase in the popularity of disposal cameras – even disposable digital cameras. Analyst firm IDC said disposal camera sales reached a high of 460 million units in 2004.

  • About 30 percent of all households across the United States (about 34 million homes) use landscaping companies to maintain their lawns and yards. Consumers in the U.S. spent more than $44.7 billion on landscaping, according to the National Gardening Association. The growth of landscaping services increases about 10 percent each year.
  • The market for grocery delivery is expected to reach a high of $7.5 billion in 2008. The average time it takes to order groceries is about 10 minutes, according to a report in the Canadian Press. Why go to the supermarket?
  • 2007 marked the sixth consecutive year that online sales increased at a double-digit rate. Last year, online sales hit an all-time high of about $62.7 billion.
  • Going out to eat – even at fast food and casual restaurants is declining in favor of “prepared foods” consumers can buy at supermarkets (or have delivered by supermarkets) and pop into the microwave oven at home, according to a study by Technomic.

Americans view these everyday tasks as chores – unnecessary inconveniences and time wasters better delegated to another. But it’s a mistake to think of these things as chores – they’re responsibilities. They’re the cost of self-sufficiency (and, quite frankly, help build character). Isn’t the child who does their own homework better off than the child who pays someone else to do it?

There is, of course, an enormous price for all of this convenience: pollution, climate change, and energy consumption. But the high social and cultural costs may be the most damaging. All this convenience – and buck passing – is isolating individuals and eroding the social fabric of our neighborhoods and communities.

This disconnect may be this is why Americans continue to believe our society is at its most dangerous point in history despite a long-time trend in declining violent crime rates (the homicide rate in 2005, for example, was at its lowest point since 1965. But good lucking trying to convince people of that).

My parents knew all of their neighbors intimately. The women all stayed home with their children – set up play dates, babysat for each other, visited each other for lunch and tea. My father knew the men because every weekend they were outside cutting their lawns, trimming their hedges, painting their houses and garages, washing their cars, and performing other regular maintenance on their homes. They took breaks together, borrowed tools from each other, and shared beers at the end of the day.

That forged friendships which lead to family barbeques, joint vacations, dinner and movie dates, dinner parties, etc. When I was growing up, I was intimate with the insides of every neighbor’s house, played with their children, knew their relatives, and thought of neighbors as surrogate parents.

Now as an adult, I’ve never been inside any of my neighbors’ houses, except for one. Only four people out of 10 houses on my section of street even cut their own lawns (and this includes a 75-year-old widow).

Our thirst for convenience undermines our communities. Ordering DVDs over the Internet has closed down one of the two video stores in town. Amazon.com and other online book retailers shuttered the two bookstores many years ago. Home theater will eventually eradicate movie houses. Can gourmet “prepared meals” soon replace restaurants?

We even let convenience erode services we used to get for free. That’s why we now pump our own gas and why we’re starting to check-out and bag our own groceries at the supermarket. Because doing it alone is faster.

Convenience has become an addiction. One all responsible adults should try and break. Mow your own lawn. Rake rather than use a gas-powered blower. Paint your house. Go food shopping. These tasks? These chores?

It’s called life.


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Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Guilty Pleasures: Songs You Only Listen to Alone

A rather callous friend has a favorite axiom in the form of a riddle. It goes like this: “What do mopeds and fat girls have in common? They’re fun to ride, but you don’t want your friends to see you on one.”

Clearly, he’s a man of high culture.

But there is a deeper meaning here. There are some things that are oh-so pleasurable – but extremely embarrassing.

We call them guilty pleasures.

And nowhere do guilty pleasures proliferate like they do in music. All of us have those damnable songs that we wouldn’t be caught dead listening to if there were other people in the room.

Songs that make us prance and sing in the shower – and then we pretend to hate when our jazz aficionado friend comes over for brunch and we talk about the genius of Miles Davis and Charles Mingus.

Allow us to share with you some of those guilty pleasures. Those ridiculous little numbers that we can’t shake – those sugary, bouncy tunes that we can’t live without (even if we listen to them in the closet).


U Can’t Touch This

Artist: MC Hammer (see video above)

Released: June 1990

Album: "Please Hammer Don’t Hurt ‘Em"

Ridiculous Fact: The song is used in a commercial for the antipbacterial hand cream Purell.

Favorite Lyric: “Break it down/ Stop, Hammer time!”

Where Are They Now: MC Hammer is married with six children. He became a born-again Christian in 1997 and currently has a TV sow on the Trinity Broadcast Network. He actually officiated the wedding of washed up actor Corey Feldman in 2002.

Stunning Insight: The real reason “U Can’t Touch This” rocks is because it samples Rick James’ “Super Freak.”

Ice, Ice Baby

Artist: Vanilla Ice

Released: 1990

Album: "To The Extreme"

Ridiculous Fact: “Ice, Ice Baby” was used on the commercial advertising the children’s Christmas movie “The Santa Clause 3.”

Favorite Lyric: “Yo VIP let’s kick it!”

Where Are They Now: Vanilla Ice has become a staple on bad reality TV shows – the low point being beaten in a boxing match by Todd Bridges during “Celebrity Boxing.” He was also arrested in 2001 and in 2008 for beating his wife.

Stunning Insight: That familiar base line? It’s David Bowie and Queen’s song “Under Pressure.”

Scooby Snacks

Artist: Fun Lovin’ Criminals

Released: 1995

Album: "Come Find Yourself"

Ridiculous Fact: The Scooby Snacks in question are diazepam (also known as Valium), which allows bank robbers to remain cool, calm, and collective during a heist.

Favorite Lyric: “Is this some Kharmic-Chi love thing happening here baby or what.”

Where Are They Now: The band is still together and has a cult following, especially in Britain.

Stunning Insight: The popularity of “Scooby Snacks” may have been because of the sampling of Quentin Tarantino movies in the song.

I’m Your Boogie Man

Artist: KC and the Sunshine Band

Released: 1977

Album: "Part 3"

Ridiculous Fact: The song was featured in all four “Scary Movie” trailers.

Favorite Lyric: “I’m your boogie man that’s what I am.”

Where Are They Now: Harry Wayne Casey “KC” still tours and does about 200 shows a year.

Stunning Insight: KC and the Sunshine Band made a career of writing disco songs that became guilty pleasures. DaRK PaRTY has a bad KC jones.

Achy Breaky Heart

Artist: Billy Ray Cyrus

Released: 1992

Album: "Some Gave All"

Ridiculous Fact: The popular song was partly responsible for helping revive an American tradition: the mullet hairstyle.

Favorite Lyric: You can tell your ma I moved to Arkansas
Or you can tell your dog to bite my leg.”

Where Are They Now: While his popularity has plummeted, Billy Ray Cyrus is still kicking around on the entertainment fringes and even sang the “Star Spangled Banner” to kick-off game 5 of the 2006 World Series. He also has a new hit song “Ready, Set, Don’t Go” released in 2007.

Stunning Insight: On further reflection “Achy Breaky Heart” isn’t that good.


Footloose

Artist: Kenny Loggins

Released: 1984

Album: The Footloose Movie Soundtrack

Ridiculous Fact: Kenny Loggins performed the song at Live Aid with Chevy Chase in 1985.

Favorite Lyric: “Loose, footloose/Kick off our Sunday shoes/ Please, Louise/ Pull me offa my knees.”

Where Are They Now: Loggins is back to performing and recording again. He released an album in 2005 and started his own record label “180 Music” in 2007.

Stunning Insight: The song is better than the movie - but only just barely.


You Dropped a Bomb on Me

Artist: The Gap Band

Released: 1982

Album: "Gap Band IV"

Ridiculous Fact: The song is played on the Dale & Holley Show on sports radio station WEEI in Boston every time they blow up a caller.

Favorite Lyric: “You turn me out, you turn me on/ You turned me loose, then you turned me wrong.”

Where Are They Now: The band still performs and many of the members have solo albums.

Stunning Insight: Believe it or not, but the Gap Band has 19 albums – the first coming in 1974 and the last one released in 2001. That’s four decades of music.

Who Let the Dogs Out?

Artist: Baha Men

Released: 2000

Album: “Who Let the Dogs Out?”

Ridiculous Fact: The song is a cover of a tune originally recorded in Trinidad in 1998.

Favorite Lyric: “Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof).”

Where Are They Now: No one is quite sure. The Baha Men disappeared after releasing an album in 2004. It’s likely that the Bahamas-based band disbanded.

Stunning Insight: The song was released on the Rugrats movies soundtrack as well, but has found a real home in sports stadiums around the United States.

Jump Around

Artist: House of Pain (see video below)

Released: 1992

Album: “House of Pain”

Ridiculous Fact: The song is featured in the movie “Mrs. Doubtfire.”

Favorite Lyric: “I’ll serve your ass like John MacEnroe/ If your steps up, I’m smacking the ho.”

Where Are They Now: The band broke up (I know, I know, it breaks me up as well). One member founded an art company and DJ Lethal actually joined Lim Bizkit.

Stunning Insight: This song is oddly addictive, yet the House of Pain never could capture magic in bottle again and they remain famous for being one of those one-hit wonder groups.

Bust A Move

Artist: Young MC

Released: 1989

Album: “Stone Cold Rhymin’”

Ridiculous Fact: Flea from the Red Hot Chili Pepper’s plays the bassline in the song.

Favorite Lyric: “A chick walks by you wish you cold sex her/ But you’re standn’ on the wall like you was Poindexter.”

Where Are They Now: Young MC – a.k.a. Marvin Young – still performs and lives in Arizona.

Stunning Insight: Yes, we dance in our underwear.

Stayin’ Alive

Artist: Bee Gees

Released: 1978

Album: “Saturday Night Fever” soundtrack

Ridiculous Fact: The video of “Stayin’ Alive” would get the Bee Gees arrested in most states nowadays for wearing their pants that are too tight.

Favorite Lyric: “I’m goin’ no where/ Some body help me there.”

Where Are They Now: Maurice Gibb died in 2003. Robin and Barry have reunited a few times to play concerts.

Stunning Insight: Try not to sing this baby in a high-pitched voice.


Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now)

Artist: C+C Music Factory

Released: 1990

Album: “Gonna Make You Sweat”

Ridiculous Fact: It was sung with a harmonica by Borat in the comedy “Borat’s Guide to America.”

Favorite Lyric: “Party people in the house move.”

Where Are They Now: The band broke up, but Robert Clivilles is in a new group called MVP

Stunning Insight: There’s a reason why the song keeps cropping up in movie comedies, but it makes you want to dance your ass off.


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